Tag: Behavior

Middle Schooler Equals Smart Cranky and Sensitive

You never understand whether to appreciate a growing up middle school kid or to resent the cranky argumentative. The sharp contrast signs of a smart child versus aggressive debater of a pre-teen child is a normal.

Elementary school leaves behind a world when your child enters the middle school. Now, your child is capable of handling more work and responsibility. Has grown up physically and is able to handle more physical and mental challenges. Middle school provides opportunities for the child to explore more about self and know the strengths and weaknesses. They are now smart enough to make their own decisions and choices. They are able to handle the changes in their bodies and minds. They can acknowledge the changes happening to their friends too. Everything seems perfect. Not yet.

Middle school success also brings a lot of confidence in children. This may cross the boundaries some times and may lead to questions. Such as, why I have to brush my teeth, why I need to take bath, why do I have to do the work, why I have to listen to you and blah blah blah. Voila, welcome to the new child. These questions would have been made sense from the elementary child perspective. But, you may wonder why a middle schooler is asking these questions. Well, now you may have to take some patience stand and repeat the answers carefully as you would to do the elementary child. You may have to remind the basics again and review the guidelines again. Remember, now you can no way shove the questions or hush the child. You may have to reason and explain more to the now grown up midde schooler.

Mostly, there would be no difference between the elementary child and a middle school or a high school child. But, they may show some extremely adult like choices and conversations in the pre-teens. And sometimes go back to the elementary child like arguments. Sometimes, you may be bewildered by their explanations and overwhelmed by their accomplishments. And yet sometimes you will be shocked as why you have to explain the little things. Remember that they are now more smarter and equipped with better knowledge and skills. So, you have to take a firm approach on the rules and consequences. Do not let your love for them influence their ability to get-away with the mistakes. However, it is equally important to appreciate the good behavior and achievements to encourage further.

Watch out for any signs of abuse, depression or bullying. You can give positive suggestions and neutral feedback to help them take better decisions. Pre-teens are emotionally more vulnerable and susceptible to anger. They need your love and support more than ever. Show some concern and care and shower some hugs and kisses. They will be your sweet kids again. 🙂

Scared to be a Role Model

Whatever I do, whatever I say, wherever I go, I am aware that two tiny eyes are watching me and observing. Yes, children watch and observe us all the time and often imitate. Sometimes its scarier to be having so much influence and being a role model to children.

Children and Parents

Children observe parents’ every move and action. Most kids imitate their parents which some times is amusing and some times not. They observe:

  • What we say
  • What we do
  • What we eat
  • How we behave
  • Where we go
  • How we exercise
  • What we do in free time
  • How are we managing friends
  • What we do in critical situations

Often, children can catch us telling lie or skipping a chore and immediately point it out. 🙂 And of course, they learn from us.

Most of the times it may not be convenient for adults to explain their actions and behavior. But, we have to explain why we are doing or not doing a task if they ask. Then, they may take a decision or draw a conclusion what is alright or not.

Role Model

Being a role model is not always easy. We may not be perfect all the times and cannot always preach to do the right when we ourselves are not doing. I think it is a continuous struggle to be honest with children and set up good examples for them to adhere.

Children immediately look up to their parents in any situations during their initial development stages. So, we need to be a little careful and choosy in using the words and doing the actions. After all, we do not want children to learn what is not good for them eventually. 🙂